Sunday, December 24, 2006
I slept late last night as usual...coz after the audition at the pub went to hang out ...the audition wasnt that much of a success ... some hiccups along the way...each time i go perform i learnt something new. I love to perform.. even though sometimes i may screw things up and end up in disappointment.....but in the pub yesterday the mic and sound system is a lot better than the pub on thursday night. .. but dun think we can get it... first interview screwed up? i'm not sure.. not very happy with our performance overall....i think we did a better job on thursday...it's juz that because we were late the boss wasnt too please with us ....
Thursday night was juz a chance for us to practice performing in front of a crowd... managed to get some response on Thursday saying some lame stuffs...... but there is satisfaction everytime there is response from the crowd. ... but anyway the system there sucks big time.. i cant hear what i'm singing most of the time....
I was not very pleased with the performance yesterday.... it's not a matter of whether we get the job it's a matter of whether i meet my own expectations.... i think i probably can do better than that...i juz feel that certain things are unfair.. that's all.... u can work so hard to do something but get no recognition... whilst someone else didnt really work at all... but was juz born with it... gets everyone's recognition....Life's unfair...juz gotta live with it..
tell u a sad story .. say there is this girl named G... and a boy named B.. G knew about her bad temper and promised B to change it .. B said he understood but looking at this situation i dun think so... as everyone knows changing a part of ur personality takes time it's not instant....G tried her best to change but at times couldnt control herself .... B was unhappy... but he didnt tell G... G tought that everything was fine.....until one day came across B's blog.. than G was totally upset and disappointed, surprised that she makes such a lousy gf without knowing it.....
It's very sad for G to find out that not even one of B's blog is a happy post.... every post is upset... G felt lousy ... useless... that she knew nothing about all these.... thinking and thinking for the past few days... the mistakes she made unknowingly... G really did tried her best.... but B do not seem to feel it.... why do B only have to view at G's faults? dont G have a good side too?
Is it fair for B to compare G with other people juz coz G may be insensitive or lose her temper at times? G really tried her best to change... G had never been that accommodating to anyone but B in her whole life....G do not blame B ... she juz felt upset and sad that's all....sad that B only mentioned G's faults but not the things that G did for B that made him happy..... fro the posts ... G only read about her own faults.... post after post... it's quite upsetting and hurting for her to handle...for anyone to be in G's shoes.. knowing ur bf was unhappy each time he hang out with u... is really an upsetting thing.... however she tried to tell B but B say forget it..push the topic away... G juz felt upset ...:-( she never felt so upset before..... she now know that she is a lousy gf ... feeling like a total useless bum...B sometimes do not know the amount of insecurity G has when wif B.. but it doesnt matter she do not wish to say anyway.. B do not noe how much G regret and felt guilty each time she loses her temper at B.... Didnt G did something that let B happy before? it appears 100 percent of all the posts are the things that G did that upset B... but nothing that G did that made B happy.... tt's why G felt useless.... she actually did nothing to make someone happy.... i dun blame her... if i were her i felt useless too.....
G was juz upset why B do not even feel the slightest love from G?... it appears to be this way on his blog....
sad story? ... i would have been real upset if i were G...sighz forget it....
okie gtg
Thank someone for being there for me once again.. i appreciate it :-p it's amazing how u r always the first one to notice when i'm upset or in tears.....
*失败是拿来形容我 吗?*
*我只能默默在 这叹气。。想想我 给你的伤害。。我有时忘了你对我的期待。。但我
真的真的不是故意的。。原 来你是那么的不开心 。。如果说我不是故意的我想 你也
不会开心点。。：-(**
*我真的好努力。。从来也没有为过谁那么努力过。。只可惜你都没有感觉到。。有可
能是我的努力还是不够。根本没有达到你的要求。。真的难过*
这几天其实好难过。。想这件事想得好辛苦但我也没跟你说。。算了：-( 叹气都是我不好：-(
你 知不知道我知道后有多 难 过吗？有多沮 丧。。 伤心。。失 败：-(
*原 来我是一个成功的失 败者。。样样做的都比 别人差。。叹气*
I'm juz Down.....
1.13pm
Sunday
24-12-06
It’s touching if someone notices ur need without u having to say or do anything, and even more touching if the same person tries his best to satisfy ur need even before u take any actions to satisfy ur own needs.
12:06:00 PM
