The Girl

Brenda
01 January

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Friday, August 31, 2007


Tonight i will be leaving Singapore...

For juz a few days...

Nothing worth mentioning actually..

Will be back even before anyone realize i'm missing...

整个宇宙, 浩瀚无边的尽头

每颗渺小星球, 全都绕著你走

也许会笑着哭

但那人是你所以不怕苦

爱我

非你莫属


1:01:00 PM



Tuesday, August 28, 2007


Feeling sleepy

I guess i havent really replenish all the energy and sleep time i lost for the past week.....

It's impossible to replenish a week's rest all in a day.....

And besides my appointment today was delayed after i'm all ready to go out.. :-(

What Luck?

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

GRrRrRrRrRrRrRrRrRrRrR!!!!!

It's a raining day today....

Feeling cold....

Raining days soothes a person's mood.....

will today be as gloomy as the other rainy day?

My temper hasn't been too mild recently... guess coz of the lack of rest........

2 tired individuals often have a higher tendency to spark unwanted friction...........

Hugs and kisses may juz be the best remedy to all the tiredness and previous stress experienced...











1:08:00 PM



Friday, August 24, 2007


Exam period is really hell....



Hate it...



Detest it...



:-(



Who likes it anyway?



I'm crapping again as always.. ha!



Staying awake always become the hardest thing to do, when i am faced with a pile of boring notes......:-x



Sometimes, when a person is overly-stressed, have a higher tendency to engage in a half-dazed stituation, self-humouring and also some form of self-consoling....



Trying hard to humour myself..



Trying to Humour myself all the way up to Monday....



excluding tonight...



I have 2 more nights to endure...



Endurance is key...



But there are "PLUS" points for exams too.....



Exams = Increased anxiety=Increased Stress = Increased Frustration = Increased Tiredness



My so-called "PLUS" points... self humouring again..



Oh and Increased Headaches.....



wa... feeling real drowsy and tired at the moment...



My energy is draining.....



running out fast...



I need energy drink....



Red Bull pls anyone?



*Missing sleep... missing rest....Looking forward to spending time with my bed after all this.......*



*Suffering an addiction for hugs and kisses, as always..*



*Always insufficient...*



*Words of comfort urged me to strive on....*



*A heart that always misses.....*



Counting down ......



I wan to get this over and done with.....



ASAP!!!

















11:58:00 PM



Saturday, August 18, 2007


It's a raining and gloomy day today..
I dun feel as itchy as the past few days now..
Finally..
left with juz a few patches here and there..
Not in the best of moods today, a few unhappy incidents encountered...
Well, everyone is different, with different perspectives towards different situations, in all, no one's to blame... it's juz a difference in thinking...but still can't help feeling upset over it...didn't expect it to be like that.....
anyway it's over, there won't be a next time anymore. It's really not hard to actually sense the unwillingness... it's juz that i chose to think of myself as being over-paranoid... but guess now all's clear... no more doubts.. no more question marks.. I sort of got the hidden meaning, the mask is being revealed...
Moving on with a heavy heart...into other issues...
Some unhappiness experienced too today... difficult to put it
down into words but it's the feeling of wanting to help but can't do much to help...in other words, having the heart to provide help, but do not have the ability to do so.....that's sad...but it's unavoidable in life.
i guess everyone has got to stand for their own rights, know when to voice out when the situation is unfair. I don't believe in taking every mistake as ur own whenever the situation becomes unfavourable. It does not solve the problem, instead it juz caused others to view u as someone who is nice to take advantage of. There is often a second time and a third time and the situation might become worse, therefore, taking all the blame, and keeping quiet is not the solution to the problem.
As humans, having too much of the soft side, often cause someone to lose out. I do not think it's worth it...
it's only worth it if u enjoy being in such a situation.... but i dun think anyone will enjoy this... having too much of the soft side is not good... as having too much of something is always not healthy...it juz gives others more room to step all over u.... it depends on yourself.. it's up to u to decide what is best for u... Otherwise, i can actually picture similar problems appearing no matter where ..
Today i felt lousy.... not only due to all these matters... i also receive like 3 prank calls.. i wonder who is that idiot... who called and mumbled some shit language that i dun even understand.... and worse still, the previous call i received have vulgarities in it... not going to pick up any of such calls ....
Matters became worse when i cant find my bloody keys... and coz of that i cant go anywhere out of the house... juz slap me..
I'm stuck in this house all alone...
Juz when i can't go out anymore...
guess what?
The keys appeared...
everything Sucks!
I hate today!!!!!!!!!
Haven't really started on the books yet ...
sighz...
*I can't do much to help, no matter how much i wan to... u have to be strong and help yourself... but one thing's for sure, u have my support..*
*Rotten luck today....:-(*
*I can't wait for the 27th.....*
*My cravings for chocolates is working up again.. !**
*Hugz n kisses are only precious when it's real...*
*Wun be getting any today...*


8:45:00 PM



Thursday, August 16, 2007


Red patches here and there....everywhere....

Worse in the night....

I'm damn itchy...

itchy! itchy! itchy!

irritating!

*Every word and act of care and concern matters... presence too... *

*Can't be having any presence tonight though..:-(*

*Will someone juz scratch me to sleep tonight once again?*

*I need it badly....*

Pls.....

你是否也和我一样, 也同样在等你手机响?






11:56:00 PM



Wednesday, August 15, 2007


First it's food poisoning....which comprises of diarrhoea, irritating bloated stomach caused by irregular meals , vomitting and a headache....

then

here comes...

skin rashes..which comprises of pink patches... and endless degree of itchiness....itchy itchy itchy..,all i can do is scratch! scratch! scratch! which i'm not supposed to do so.. but it's hard to control..didnt sleep well last night... i was buzi scratching the whole time...cant believe i can be such a monkey... today was a long sucky day, was in school all the way till 9 plus for the ticketing shit... :-(

dead tired....

All these sucks..

my body's really weak especially lately..

haven't been well for ages.. :-(

I'm so damn worried for tmr's ticketing test...adding on to the stress levels... my music project is still not fully done...

I juz hope for a pass...juz a pass for both...

really worried...

Feeling real tired...

sick of all this shit...

:-x

I need to get out of this place!

I'm in a down mood for the whole of today...

A foul mood... a sucky mood....

juz wan to pen down my frustrations...

:-(

I wan to eat sweet stuffs....

sweet stuffs makes me happier....

got some yesterday...:-p

my constant craving for chocolates will always be there... esp during stressful periods and during that time of the month......

Ha!

*Cant wait for all these to be over....*

*My eyelids are getting heavier with every word i type....*

*I need Sleep more then Food.... seriously...*

*Someone's presence gives me comfort, but too bad i won't be having any tonight.... :-(*

*Words of comfort matters, actions of care and concern matters, presence matters...*

*A heart that consistently misses..... *

*Can someone scratch me to sleep tonight?*

pls..........









10:50:00 PM



Saturday, August 11, 2007


Didn't went home the previous night...

Slept on-off though when i got home in the morning...

However, my head still hurts...

LAck of sleep?

Tiredness?

I guess it was all worthwhile coz i get to spent more time with u....

Last night, I can feel ur worries over my needs.... The concern was well-appreciated...
U understood my personality of putting on a false front to prevent creating trouble yesterday....U knew what i wanted although i didnt exactly voice it out as i didnt want to be a trouble-maker.... but coz of u ... i dun have to force myself into having something I dun want....
Thks :-p

Was happy to hear compliments from u too yesterday...

Every word from u matters....

I am having phobia over steamboat at the moment....

now the smell of it makes me sick....

:-(

coz of this irrtitating bloated stomach of mine...

Hope my stomach can recover soon........

i mean FULLY recover!!!


Can't wait...

I wan Chocolates!


*U make staying over last night meaningful, tired but meaningful and worthwhile*

*Felt safe to have u by my side yesterday....*


*Hugs and kisses will never be enough.....*

*不管在哪里,只要和你在一起。。。。*





11:07:00 PM



Thursday, August 09, 2007


Was it my stomach?

Was it the medicine?

My body doesnt feel well ...

n so is my heart...

Can I juz disappear?


5:00:00 PM



Tuesday, August 07, 2007


Wondering what went wrong again....

I'm having

a dreadful headache now...

experiencing a bloated stomach...

nauseous

I think i'm having digestion problems nowadays...

All coz of my weak and sensitive stomach....

Facing the computer the whole day to complete the damn sucky reflections simply does not help in making me feel better..

after looking and looking at the computer for the entire day, i am still short of a final reflection....

wa... i find this biz ent reflections thing totally redundant.. i really dont see myself being an entrepreneur after these entire course...

needless to say

I felt worse..

:-x

I always seemed to be not feeling well during the wrong times...

I wan to get this shit over and done with....asap


*Time spent together is never too long, the desire to meet is constantly there.....*


*Your presence is very much needed especially during times like these...*


*Still not getting enough of ur hugs and kisses....*





9:48:00 PM



Saturday, August 04, 2007


How should I describe this friday?

Boring?

Dull?

Different?

ok somewhat different from the usual friday nights...no pubbing...no extreme night out....

Weird?

Feels weird to attend it alone...probably used to the prolonged dependency I have gradually developed as time goes by....

However, coincidentally, circumstances tally with my needs to rest early for the test tmr morning.....

But

Thing is..

I'm not in bed....

I did not rest as early as i should...

I'm still wide awake.....at this hour

to study?

Not really....

Waiting for someone?

Yea, i suppose so....


*It doesnt matter how frequent we met, It doesn't matter how short the length of time in which we are apart, the missing will always be as intense all the same....*

*The warmth of a hug, acts of care and concern provides happiness, assurance and sense of security*

*Could not get enough of ur care and concern*

*Still not getting enough of ur hugs and kisses...*

*Guess I never will..*









1:26:00 AM



Wednesday, August 01, 2007


Many old habits to break...

Many flaws to change...

To be able to throw away the negative .....

To be able to discard the unwanted...

Tat's wat is wanted...

Not easy...

Trying...

Nobody's perfect....

I'm only human afterall....


9:21:00 PM